“Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.”
-Proverbs 16:18 (KJV)
“He who refuses advice cannot avoid trouble; the pit he ignores today will receive him tomorrow.”
African Proverbs
This ancient truth has outlived generations, cultures, and civilizations because it speaks to a universal human weakness. Pride blinds before it destroys. Ego numbs before it ruins. The pit does not suddenly appear, it is dug slowly, confidently, and often applauded by the one who will eventually fall into it.
The most dangerous pits are not the ones we see; they are the ones we deny.
THE STORY OF EZE-ONYE-AGWANAM AND OBI-DIYA
In a land where wisdom was traditionally preserved through counsel, elders, and the quiet strength of family, there lived a man named Eze-Onye-Agwanam, a name that meant “the king who believes he knows it all.” The name followed him like a prophecy.
Eze-Onye-Agwanam rose swiftly in influence, wealth, and public respect. His voice carried authority. His decisions were bold. People admired his confidence and feared his certainty. To the community, he was a man destined for greatness. To himself, he was beyond correction.
Yet beneath the applause, unseen beneath his confident steps, a pit was forming, wide, deep, and silent.
OBI-DI-YA—THE COUNSEL HE DESPISED
Eze-Onye-Agwanam’s wife was called Obi-Di-Ya, meaning “the heart of the husband.” She was not loud, nor forceful, nor eager to dominate conversations. But her words were measured, timely, and rooted in discernment.
She warned him gently,
about friends who praised too quickly,
about decisions made without patience,
about pride that dressed itself as courage.
But Eze-Onye-Agwanam dismissed her counsel. He convinced himself that firmness was leadership and that listening was weakness. He told himself her concern was emotional, not insightful. He believed authority required certainty, not reflection, especially not reflection influenced by a wife.
Each warning ignored was another layer of earth removed beneath his feet.
WHEN ADVICE BECOMES OFFENSE
Over time, Obi-Di-Ya’s wisdom began to sound like opposition to him. Her concern felt like doubt. Her questions felt like disrespect. Ego quietly altered his interpretation of love.
When ego takes control, truth becomes a threat.
Instead of reflecting, he defended. Instead of adjusting, he argued. The more she pleaded, the more he hardened. Eventually, he stopped listening altogether.
Silence replaced counsel. Distance replaced intimacy. Confidence replaced caution.
THE FALL THAT DID NOT ANNOUNCE ITSELF
The collapse did not come suddenly. It arrived in stages.
Bad alliances drained his resources. Rash decisions exposed his weakness. His influence weakened. His name lost weight. When trouble finally rose, the same voices that once praised his boldness disappeared without explanation.
Only then did Eze-Onye-Agwanam look down, and realize he was already in the pit.
Pits formed by ego are difficult to escape because pride destroys the ladder before the fall. He had rejected wisdom, insulted counsel, and silenced the one voice that truly sought his good.
THE PAIN OF LATE REMEMBRANCE
In his lowest moment, memory became his companion. Obi-Di-Ya’s words returned, not as comfort, but as evidence. Regret became his teacher.
By this stage, repair was harder. Trust was weakened. Consequences had matured. What could have been prevented by humility now demanded endurance.
Wisdom ignored early becomes sorrow carried later.
THE NATURE OF AN INVISIBLE PIT
A pit that is visible invites caution. A pit that is announced invites preparation. But a pit hidden by ego invites confidence, false confidence.
Ego convinces a person that they are exempt from consequences, too experienced to be corrected, too important to be wrong. It does not ask questions; it issues conclusions. It does not listen; it assumes.
The proud do not see the pit because ego paints danger as disrespect and correction as jealousy. Thus, the very tools meant to save them, truth, counsel, warning, are rejected as insults.
HOW EGO MAINTAINS BLINDNESS
Ego protects a fragile self-image by resisting anything that challenges it. Praise is welcomed, warnings are minimized, and advice is reinterpreted as attack.
Over time, the individual becomes trapped within their own self-image. Growth slows. Learning stops. Adjustment feels unnecessary.
The tragedy is not lack of knowledge, it is refusal. Not absence of wisdom, but rejection of it.
THE QUIET WAR AGAINST DEPENDENCE
Ego replaces dependence with self-sufficiency. One may still speak of faith, still use spiritual language, yet inwardly trust personal strength more than guidance.
Pride blocks help because it cannot admit need. Grace finds no entry where self-importance occupies all the space.
A full cup cannot receive more water.
THE INVISIBLE PIT IN OUR TIME
Eze-Onye-Agwanam’s story is not ancient history, it is current reality.
Ego still ruins marriages, destroys leadership, collapses institutions, and isolates individuals. Many still mistake confidence for wisdom. Many still confuse silence with agreement. Many still reject counsel and call it strength.
Yet the pit remains invisible, until the fall.
THE WAY OF ESCAPE-HUMILITY
Humility is not weakness. It is clear self-awareness. It listens without fear, learns without shame, and corrects without resentment.
Humility asks:
What if I am wrong?
What if I do not see everything?
What if wisdom is speaking through someone unexpected?
Those who ask these questions rarely fall into pits they did not dig.
CLOSING AFRICAN PROVERB
“He who refuses advice cannot avoid trouble; the pit he ignores today will receive him tomorrow.”
May wisdom teach us early what pain teaches too late. May humility open our eyes before pride closes them. And may we learn to see the pit before we fall into it.
